Comments (67)

1664597 - 12 May, 2024 - 10:36PM

I've met more than one lady on here that had a level of life trauma that should really have been addressed professionally. (both forms of abuse).

There's a part of me that feels a compulsion to help but I've now figured out I need to switch that off as much as I can on IE for reasons of my own mental health.

I tend to try and point them in the right direction gently and wish them luck now.

 1 member likes this comment.

Housewife84 - 12 May, 2024 - 08:42AM

Yes lol rather just meet and get busy lol 😜

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Life is a beach - 11 May, 2024 - 10:49PM

Some sane comments below.
Old snapper I have a lot of respect for you. What you did was amazing and I am sure you really helped her in a difficult time.
In answer to the question, nothing wrong with having a moan about things now and then with your IE if you have a solid relationship. Don't moan all the time, otherwise you will spoil everything.
We all need to have a moan now and then, however, people who moan all the time do become draining. Don't be one of those!

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Legs&Eyes - 11 May, 2024 - 09:57PM

Old Sapper

Thats an amazing thing you did..you could so easily have discarded her, and she clearly needed/wanted those chats or else she would have discarded you... big respect for that

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Old Sapper - 11 May, 2024 - 06:29PM

The only time I've had anything like that I realised the lady I was chatting to was seriously in need of support.
Her husband had been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer and I deliberately kept chatting to her until a couple of months after he'd died.
We never did get to meet, but hopefully, having my shoulder to cry or rant on helped her cope.

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1665613 - 09 May, 2024 - 01:47PM

That’s rubbish mane some people do that but not me, life’s for living and when you meet someone off hear it’s about them and you x

Steelblueyes77 - 07 May, 2024 - 08:36AM

That's so bad. This is not a confessor or a Samaritans site.. It is unreasonable rude and unwanted for someone to dump their problems on anyone else. The idea is to seek a kindred spirit and enjoyed the best things in life not to dump your problems on anyone else .

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1660660 - 07 May, 2024 - 08:34AM

There is clearly a range of acceptable “dumping”, isn’t there?
Some people are happy to have a “second wife” level of dumping, and some people are after a fairy-tale level. I think both of these are correct levels- as long as both people’s expectations are being met, and communicated in advance.

I am a very open person and like to talk- but as I am very positive by nature and not a Whinger I rarely dump. Though Tbf that’s the same at home for me.

It is important that there is a degree of respect for the spouses- it isn’t fair on anyone to be whinging about your spouse all the time. Similar if your job is shit, do something about it. Whingeing to your IE isn’t going to make your job better. If your kids are off the rails, learn and do some parenting. If you haven’t got enough money, improve your prospects.

Now I’ve given you all the answers, you haven’t got an excuse for dumping anymore. Listeners: print this on a yellow card! 🤣

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ExoticOrchid - 06 May, 2024 - 10:21PM

HH76 - 08:32PM

To a certain extent, you are correct.

However, you've got to remember many are here to forget their "real" lives for a while and have a little "me time" and therefore they don't want to be reminded of the mundane stuff.

Granted if the liaison becomes a longer term one, then certain confidences are bound to be exchanged and *both* parties would want to share their innermost thoughts/worries to a certain degree.

All depends on individuals and the kind of relationship they have.

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1661304 - 06 May, 2024 - 08:32PM

Not sure I agree. If you can’t be there to listen to it all, the good and the not so good then you’re just there for the good times and life’s not like that. Get to know someone fully and openly can lead to great times together. Only my view and not for everyone.

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