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Communication

I have just started seeing a new IE - how often should I message her inbetween meets? Any advice would be appreciated

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Comments (85)

ExoticOrchid - 21 Mar, 2024 - 01:08PM

H101 - 10:55PM

In my opinion, she sounds very immature, needy and demanding! Think yourself lucky that you've dodged a bullet here.

Is she very young? Surely a grown up doesn't delete someone just because a reply wasn't forthcoming immediately, especially when they have already met each other twice!

Everyone has lives outside of IE for goodness sake.


Paula99 - 21 Mar, 2024 - 11:10AM

Give and take is needed here …we do have lives and some likes to message regularly and others don’t …it depends on the 2 people …

Try not to be too quick to ‘delete’ if you’re not getting a message straight away….plus it takes 2 to tango so just message him …talk about regular day stuff ..it builds the rapport between you ..
If his comms are consistently irregular… then you are not his priority so walk away ..plenty more fish 🎣

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1408586 - 21 Mar, 2024 - 10:03AM

If your comms styles aren’t a match it’s better she ended things when she did. It only because more obvious the further it goes on.

You say on your profile you act on your enthusiasms. Maybe to her it felt like you weren’t enthusiastic? And who wants that!!

Move on and good luck

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Harlequin101 - 21 Mar, 2024 - 08:54AM

My post was not clear. What I meant was can anyone understand why someone' would dump you because you had not sent a reply the same evening or before 9.45 the next morning? I am really puzzled


Suzanne1983 - 21 Mar, 2024 - 01:34AM

It depends but from mine i get messagages pretty consistantly throughout the day and evening and i text back the same.

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Harlequin101 - 20 Mar, 2024 - 10:55PM

I recently had two dates with a delightful woman. We told each other how happy we were. I sent her a message the next morning and she replied at lunchtime before going out. At 8.30pm she sent a further short message. I couldn't reply that evening as I was with friends and my wife. When I sent a message the next morning at 9.45 I saw that one from her saying she got the message and was deleting my number. She has not read any subsequent messages. Can anyone explain this? Frequent messaging is nice but...


Curvy Patrizia - 19 Jan, 2024 - 11:24PM

My IE guys have messaged every day at all times and I reciprocate, so as to build a rapport and connection.


1529050 - 08 Jan, 2024 - 04:07PM

Paula99 - 06 Jan, 2024 - 06:42AM

wise words!


Paula99 - 06 Jan, 2024 - 06:42AM

Instant communication isn’t always present …think about it we can’t communicate with our OHs ..sometimes the banter/chat is brilliant on here but when you meet there is nothing there….some are better at it when there is ‘common ground’ and others can talk to the ‘butchers dog ‘…comms is an art form and sadly most people cannot have a ‘normal ‘ conversation..

The best way to communicate is to meet meet meet and only then will you really understand how it works…there is nothing like looking someone in the eye and you will find the conversation will/will not flow accordingly..

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whisperingwillow - 05 Jan, 2024 - 09:53PM

Think there is no hard and fast rule, you do eventually find a common pace of communication when the foundation of the relationship is set, takes time though. Also, more than frequency it’s how interesting and engaging are the topics which eventually does encourage the other person to feel more to be involved.

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