Comments (52)

boav91 - 05 Jun, 2025 - 11:34PM

The biggest issue is as a few people have said is you have to do this normally. I go away for work regularly but my IE does not. That means we have had to restrict ourselves to whole days together as the longest times we have been able safely and is consistent with what we both normally would do. During that time we have both fallen asleep, well what we are all here for can be tiring! We both would love an overnight but we also know there would not be a credible excuse yet for her so we don't as much as we both would like to. I love the idea of falling asleep and waking up with them, but not yet. Dont take risks that will harm you.

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mayoman - 05 Jun, 2025 - 07:06PM

Act in haste, repent at leisure is a very apt saying in your circumstance - acting out of the ordinary will possibly draw the sort of attention at home that you might not want.....

laugar164 - 05 Jun, 2025 - 06:14PM

Unless you normally stay over night with the girls I'd say no if you are doing something out of the norm will only raise questions This is how people get caught acting out of the norm

MagicMouse321 - 04 Jun, 2025 - 02:57PM

Bizarrely, having met through IE this allows you the affordance of being truthful.

You don’t need a list of excuses up your sleeve - tell him the truth.

"I won't be staying over because….it will trigger questioning from my OH.”
"I won't be staying over because….I haven’t done his before and i’m not comfortable.”

If you put the truth out there on the table you might be able to address them as a mature couple? …and come with ways to start to approach your issue. Eg. I won't stay over, but this time i’ll stay until 10, (then 11, then 12) etc

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InspiredBy - 04 Jun, 2025 - 02:37PM

Say no for now and try to 'run' the scenario without the actual overnight sleep. I curently have no affair, so when I go out with friends I tend to do what I would if it was with an IE. Not answering all calls, being secretive (even if I'm having a negroni by myself), missing the last train on purpose, saying 'I'll crash at a friend's flat because we drank too much'. So, when the time comes it all feels normal.

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marklondonengland - 04 Jun, 2025 - 01:44PM

Basically you have no excuse that can be used unless you are regularly away from home - business trips for example. If you are almost never away from home and suddenly start staying out all night "with friends" then you may as well start sounding a siren and flashing lights to announce your intentions...

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The Devil in Me! - 04 Jun, 2025 - 11:09AM

Unless you have a rock solid (no pun intended here!) alibi then don't do it. Back in 2006 when still married I had an affair and was lucky enough to be in lust and in love. We both took chances. We both missed the last train home. We both rocked back to the hotel. We both got found out. It didn't matter to me as I was long gone from the marriage, but it ended in disaster for him. Keep safe girl.

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Pete likes wine - 04 Jun, 2025 - 09:08AM

Depends on the relationship as other's have said but also sex in the morning first thing can be really nice experience.

In addition if you go this route make sure that your cover story is solid and fluent under interrogation and never wavering - if you can build some evidence of the story thats good but offer it to quickly standby your story and dismiss the ridiculous accusation!

1494077 - 18 May, 2024 - 01:02PM

Agree with Paula99 and EO. It really depends on the relationship a person has with their IE. I probably wouldn’t have the desire to spend any additional time with someone I was simply meeting for sex. For a very well established IE however - where both of us genuinely liked each other as people, as true friend and lover - the snoring, toilet and eating habits would come part and parcel of accepting the person for who they are. For those who cannot afford to spend the night, full 8-10h Dayuse stints might go towards simulating that effect. If you don’t kill each other by then, meet after meet, it might indicate you have something good going. Or maybe that both of you are just un poco loco…..🤪

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ExoticOrchid - 18 May, 2024 - 09:02AM

P99 - 01:39PM

Exactly right.
Depends on the kind of IE relationship you have.

For the majority here, it is only the physical intimacy (sex) they have in common PLUS the fact that they don't have the opportunity to get away for longer than a few hours.

For those who are able to, it is more than just sex ... it is also about enjoying each other's company as two people who genuinely *like* each other and there is friendship.

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