Connection
What is this elusive 'connection' everyone is looking for? Someone I chatted to, just on messages, seemed to believe we had a 'connection' because we were messaging! Connection for me is something only found in its real sense on meeting.
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Comments (68)
Paula99 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 05:05PM
Hmmmm…
You can have lots of connections in your life through work /family / friends /acquaintances…but the sexual connection/chemistry is as elusive as the scarlet pimpernel…
For me ….to develop a real connection… then it just doesn’t happen over night …I can fancy a guy but do I like him enough to rip his clothes off?
There has to be a mental connection as well as a physical one…as you can have sex with anyone but will it be mind blowing ?
Connection means quality not quantity 😉
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marklondonengland - 27 Oct, 2023 - 02:52PM
You can develop a connection when messaging. It's when you feel very comfortable talking to the person and they are interesting - even if it is just messages. Of course, to develop a stronger and much closer connection you need to meet in person, but it is possible to weed out someone you will find boring in person just by trying to have a conversation online first - if they can't engage and interest you in a chat then they are unlikely to be any better in person!
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1625309 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 02:08PM
I am finding on here there is a variety of exchanges between me and different women. What I have found is the very best connections I’ve made so far (2) are with someone who’s contacted me first. It may be just coincidence of course. In both cases we’ve got on extremely well and soon began to share things in depths, about our lives as well as sexual experiences. So far haven’t met as distance is a bit of a problem but that’s another matter. But the on-line connections were soon recognised by what we talked about and would make it so much easier to develop further if we do meet.
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1622807 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 01:58PM
I think my connections are based upon how much someone is a reflection of experiences and people I'm accustomed to... to varying degrees that is.
Some people that connection is instant. For example I had a rough childhood so instantly will feel a bond with people who've had similar.
Other times is may be a similar outlook on life, maybe political leaning etc. It maybe that we are very different overall but have maybe a couple of areas where we gel.
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Life is a beach - 27 Oct, 2023 - 01:12PM
Yes, you can have a connection before you meet.
You get a feel of what the person is going to be like. You can quickly work out if you would like to meet them or not after a few messages or calls.
Meeting the person is the next step, you can then truly work if there is that spark and connection between the two of you.
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Pink Eiga - 27 Oct, 2023 - 12:27PM
It’s definitely possibly to feel a connection with someone online. From the way they respond to you, the way the conversation flows effortlessly both on and off platform. Their behaviour when we start discussing about meeting up. I don’t do quick meets, and when I do finally say yes, it is often just a tick box exercise to go to the next level. It doesn’t always work out that way of course - the face to face meet is ultimately the deciding factor.
One thing I have to say though, is that an ongoing conversation itself does not equate to a connection that warrants an IE partnership. Platonic connections also exist 😊
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1575033 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 12:03PM
In my experience the chatting is almost irrelevant, the less is more , say the right thing
is meaningless.
Yes exchange the basics, attitude, geography, practicalities, intellect, use of spell checker,
status, relationship sought, could almost be a tick list, its meeting that is the chemistry check and in 5 minutes a lot more, being ability to meet, wishing to meet, a real person,, warmth,, nut case or not, and if not agreed to meet again, agree not to straight away.
Here endeth
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1408586 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 12:02PM
Well for me yes. We’re all different!
I’m only interested in a lover who I find very attractive. I think sometimes if too much virtual connection has been built up then it can be tempting to overlook attraction.
Others who are less shallow (!) than me may feel differently
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1104299 - 27 Oct, 2023 - 11:40AM
@beckysharp
Is there such a thing as too much of a connection?! Surely the connection goes towards the whole chemistry piece?
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