Should I or shouldn’t I?
Hi, my wife and are still very much in love and are actually still having good sex but we both feel there’s a little something missing. So, we have just recently started an open relationship and we’ve both newly joined IE in the last couple of weeks or so. We’re both looking for quite different things from IE but obviously ultimately it comes down to wanting to get intimate with someone other than each other.
My wife seems to be getting loads of attention but me, not so much.
My question is, do you think the fact that I’ve mentioned in my profile about being in an open relationship is putting a lot of ladies off.
Should I not mention it? Or is it something else?
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Comments (109)
1682706 - 05 Jul, 2024 - 10:28PM
A few observations from someone who thinks an open relationship has a lot going for it:
- you love your partner, you don’t own them, that means the right for each of you to search for fulfilment
- the chances of finding someone who is a 100% perfect match is slim, so pretty much every relationship will have situations where one or other person is unhappy
- the ideal of perfect marriage and supposedly only having feelings for one person means that unhappiness has nowhere positive to go: you either have an affair which breaches trust + guilt but is exciting; get progressively more frustrated/bored and grow apart; leave
-communicate, communicate, communicate - work through the fears, open up to the fun
- it doesn’t mean you have to share everything: respect each others space/privacy goes a long way, work hard to find your own space and enjoy it, not be claustrophobic
- and it may all end in tears! But lots of relationships do, and lots of relationships find ways to exist in all sorts of unusualness
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1494077 - 05 Jul, 2024 - 08:40PM
AtP48,
I think it takes a very giving and secure personality to allow for a spouse to do this. Your wife is a lucky woman that you are so understanding. As a woman on IE, I probably wouldn’t go with a man who I knew was in an open relationship. I quite like the clandestine nature of an affair, but that’s just me.
Hope you settle into the kind of lifestyle both of you are happy with.
3 members like this comment.
1683831 - 05 Jul, 2024 - 08:12PM
It's great that you and your wife are open and communicative about your needs. Mentioning your open relationship in your profile is important for honesty and setting clear expectations. While it might put some people off, it ensures that those who do respond are genuinely comfortable with your situation. Besides this, consider optimising other aspects of your profile: ensure your photos are high quality, and make your bio engaging and reflective of your personality. Actively engage with potential matches and show genuine interest. Patience and persistence are key. Good luck!
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ExoticOrchid - 05 Jul, 2024 - 04:52PM
FluffyClouds - 09:51AM
I guess some leopards do change their spots then.
Impressive.
Well done. 👏
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Aim to please48 - 05 Jul, 2024 - 02:52PM
EmnEm123
I love you. You’re almost as entertaining as the BS you
think I’m posting 🥰🤣😂. Don’t change for anyone, not that you would😉😘.
Oh, and P99, my wife wants me to try and find happiness on here and does help, in more ways than one.
I actually consider myself a very lucky man.
Peace to all🙏🏽
EmnEm123 - 05 Jul, 2024 - 02:33PM
FluffyClouds
I really don't remember that but I will give you the benefit of the doubt. So you are one person who has admitted to being the OP. Well done! 🥱
LadyDe
You obviously haven't left the forum as you are commenting.
I have no right to object to someone having an open marriage, or anything else consenting adults want to get up to.
This particular scenario doesn't seem, to me, credible.
I won't apologise for having an opinion, after all this is the point of the forum.
I find it rather odd that a woman would complain about multiple women having an opinion.
Would you prefer that we all left the forum so that you, FluffyClouds and Enigma agree with any turgid nonsense that the men post?
4 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 05 Jul, 2024 - 09:19AM
"Leaving keys in a dish by the door"???
So very, very 1960s or which ever decade you've heard of regarding "swinging" ... 🤣🤣🤣
ExoticOrchid - 05 Jul, 2024 - 09:15AM
Yes, I get easily confused with these multiple profiles ... my bad!
Enigma.. - 05 Jul, 2024 - 08:54AM
@Aim to please48
I had a wee look at your profile earlier this morning 😊.
I thought it to be well written, open, honest and you state what you are looking for.
Your profile makes a refreshing change from the auto generated, short and over long full of BS profiles some males on here have.
And… I do hope that, going forward, if you think that Ie is the place for you, you meet someone that deserves you.
Decent and honest men are hard to find on this site.
All the best 🍀🤞🏻.
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